WTF HEADLINES WEEK OF MAR. 20, 2009

OBAMA SENDING MORE TROOPS TO AFGHANISTAN
And You Thought You Elected a President of Peace. HA!
President Barack Obama will be sending a total of 21,000 more troops to battle the Taliban and Al Quaida in Afghanistan this year, plus a few thousand advisors and technicians.
The move shakes the segment of his constituancy that voted for him to get the U.S. out of Iraq. In a now familiar pattern, the President is actually winding down the war in Iraq. Its just that those troops will be heading for the even more difficult battle against Afghani militants.
Suckas! You got punk'd.
DURN, NOW THAT THE ECONOMY THINGY IS FIXED, WE KIN GET ON WITH THE IMPORTANT STUFF
U.S. SENATE TO INVESTIGATE COLLEGE RANKINGS.
Senator Orrin Hatch is planning to introduce legislation to change the way the BOWL CHAMPION SERIES determines the top team rankings.
Everyone from the President on down has expressed dismay at the current method of choosing bowl game matchups.
Sen. Hatch was especially upset that Utah State was passed up by the committee last year, even though they were undefeated. The Judiciary Committee plans to introduce legislation to "rectify the situation".
In the House, Rep. Joe Barton (Texas) would introduce a law that would prevent the NCAA from calling any game a national championship that did not use a playoff system.
It seems we've elected a stunning collection of boobs, nincompoops, dumbasses, lying hypocrites and droolers. We, the voters, are our own worst enemies. (Okay, some Democratic behind the scenes manipulation and skullduggery may have contributed.)

HOLLYWOOD CASTING STOOGES
Carey as Curly? Del Toro is Moe. But SEAN PENN as Larry????
Hollywood has gone absolutely bonkers. First, they impugn the integrity of the Warren Report in JFK, then they lampoon the Bush Administration in FARENHEIT 9-11. But this is too much for any red-blooded American man- a THREE STOOGES movie, zany, slapsticky and all, starring Benicio Del Torro as Moe Howard, Jim Carey as Curly Joe Howard and of all choices- Sean Penn as Larry Fine.
Does this have disaster written all over it. WTF! I think this is some sort of pinkie-lib-glbt-Hate America kind of project to undermine the American psyche.